I wrote the first version of this in 2008 when two people besides me had read the books. Now that a few more people know what I’m talking about, I thought I’d dust it off.
Which Requite Character Are You?
1) If you were starring in an anime series, who would you be?
A: The unfeasibly handsome one with an ornate military uniform and long hair.
B: The reclusive genius who is building a mecha in the basement.
C: The one who causes the show’s fandom to argue unceasingly over whether there actually are people with brown skin and red hair in Japan.
D: The unfeasibly ancient and weird antagonist.
E: The androgynous one with the blue hair.
F: The special effects.
2) Which of these spare-time activities most appeals to you?
A: Fencing, music, failing to detach yourself from the Internet.
B: Gardening, visiting an industrial museum, not having to talk to people.
C: Getting a massage while someone else sorts out your accounts.
D: Talking about matters of import with interesting young people, saving the planet.
E: Bitching about other people’s fashion choices, eating small cakes, looking innocent.
F: Attempting to find a home.
3) What are you most likely to come away from a bookshop carrying?
A: Sheet music or Shakespeare.
B: The entire contents of the bookshop, if possible.
C: A grudge against your biographers.
D: Books? Physical books? This is not a relevant concept to me.
E: A dead body that needs hiding somewhere.
F: I don’t carry. I consume.
4) Which of these best describes your last relationship?
C: What do you mean, relationship, singular?
E: Difficult: the other person refuses to recognise that it’s not still going on.
F: A mutually satisfactory exchange of genetic material.
5) From this selection, you are most worried by…
A: A powerful, shadowy secret society that wants you back and is prepared to kill to retrieve you.
B: Woolly thinking. Oh, and heights.
C: What your children aren’t telling you.
D: The fate of the world.
E: Your superiors and their lack of common sense.
F: THE HEAT. THE BURNING HEAT. KILL IT OR WE DIE.
6) Are you actually going to fill in this quiz?
A: No, I have people to do that for me.
B: When someone answers my questions about the methodology.
C: It might distract me, I suppose.
D: Yes, and I already know what everyone else is going to answer too.
E: Yes, unless I need to make a dart out of it and use it to kill someone.
F: I am prepared to fill any space available, or at the very least coat the walls, ceiling and floor.
Mostly A’s: Congratulations, you are Latinus Malabranca. In situations where you think you’re the hero, you may wish to check whether you’re actually the rather befuddled love interest.
Mostly B’s: Congratulations, you are Tzenni Boccamera. You are well known and respected for your technical skills, but occasionally have problems standing up to your family.
Mostly C’s: Congratulations, you are Vikenai Helm. You’re beautiful, you’re smart and you take no crap, but you may wish to pay closer attention to your finances.
Mostly D’s: Congratulations, you are Façade Blue. You are convinced that you are doing the right thing for the right reasons. You’re trying to save the world and everyone in it. Why can’t anyone else see that?
Mostly E’s: Congratulations, you are Innes Liang. There is a non-zero chance that you can kill people with your thumb.
Mostly F’s: Er… congratulations? You are a grue. You tend to find yourself in unexpected situations, but are willing to adapt to them.